This morning I got a call from my friend, who I have not seen for two days now. Well not quite two days, but more than 24 hours, seemed like forever. She wanted to know if I was going to the grocery store could she tag along. I said sure, and we set a time for me to pick her up. When I arrived she was trying to get into her condo, having great problems with the key. I will admit, it gave me trouble too, so I suggested that she only use the top lock, since it is more secure anyway. After she threw her mail on the floor, unlike her, I asked her to get her medicine bottles, since I knew one of them needed to be refilled. I had called in the prescription on Sunday night, and she only had four of one of the meds left then.
She handed me the pill bottles as she locked the door behind her, top lock, and I counted pills in the bottles. One bottle was short pills, meaning she’s either taken too many, or something else. And the other bottle, which should have been empty, had three pills. I said to her that it looked like she hadn’t been taking her pills, and she snapped back at me I don’t need to take them every day. I said but you do, and that was that.
I asked her if she minded if I stopped at the post office, and she said certainly not, so I did. Then we went to the pharmacy, and picked up her pills, and then off to the grocery store. When we got there she jumped out of the car almost before I stopped, and walked faster than I’d ever seen her walk to the entrance. She was struggling with a cart when I got there, so I tried to help her, and she snapped, “Get your own”
She walked in quite speedily, and I really had to rush to catch up. She noticed I didn’t have a cart, and yelled at me to get my own cart, and I told her I only needed a few things and picked up a basket. Truthfully I didn’t need to be shopping, but could pick up the few things on our list since she did. She rushed past the bananas and I asked if she needed bananas, and she yelled at me that she didn’t need bananas so loudly that the guy standing there said “I hope you hear that” and chuckled. She was long gone, so she didn’t hear him, I said “Well I need bananas” which I did, and I picked them up.
I went looking for her, but she was long gone… I picked up the few things on my list, and finally caught up with her in the cereal isle. When she saw me coming, she turned around and changed directions. I let her go. I found her again on the bread isle, and went up and asked if she needed help finding anything since she was new to the store… and that is exactly how I asked her, nicely and sweetly, trying to help the situation… she snapped at me “No, leave me alone.” Boy did I get strange looks from the people around us…
I went and checked out, and waited for her by the front of the store so I could help her carry her bags. She practically ran over me with her cart trying to get out of the store. I walked directly to the car, she took a detour, I wasn’t sure where she was headed, but eventually she made it to the car. I tried to help her put her things in, but she pushed me off.
When we got back to her place I helped her carry her things in, and was headed to the kitchen with three heavy bags of kitty litter when I said “Oh you don’t want these in the kitchen” and laughed. She snapped at me, “And why not!” and I said it’s your kitty litter, and she screamed at me just put them down, which I did.
I went up to her and said nicely “Please, we need to talk”… this angry monster then screamed at me “No we don’t, I don’t want to talk, get out of here!” So I left.
It breaks my heart to see my kind loving friend like this, but I know why. In her need for independence she isn’t taking her meds, and that’s made her this way.
Now what? I can’t say.
But I hurt, my heart is breaking…
WOW, Marge, I can't imagine the pain you are feeling. You are a good friend and your friend is lucky to have you.
ReplyDeleteHang in there and keep the faith!
Kim